Heart Healthy Sandwiches

A couple months ago, I started feeling heart palpitations. They don’t hurt. They are extremely uncomfortable, though. I was able to see my primary care physician on May 19th, even though his last day was May 31. This is the doctor that’s pretty liberal with my gabapentin, which I take for anxiety, so I’ll miss him for sure. Luckily, he sent in a new gabapentin prescription with enough refills for a year. His new job is at the VA. Sucks for me!  Oh well. 

I told him about the palpitations, and he gave me a EKG in the office. Something came up on it, so I had to go in for a 24 hour “Holter Monitor” which kept track of my heart activity for 24 hours. By the time the results came in, however, it was after June 1 and he was gone. So I got an appointment with another doctor, and she basically only said that it was due to anxiety. I told her that I had anxiety for ten years, but not the palpitations for ten years. She insisted on “treating the anxiety.”  I tried to briefly explain my decade long struggle with anxiety attacks, but for one thing, she seemed like she didn’t want to hear it and for another, my therapist has told me not to tell doctors what medications were attempted before I discovered that gabapentin work so well because it can look like “drug seeking behavior.” I rolled my eyes when he told me this- that actually says bad things about their field- not me as a person. But I digress. 

This second doctor literally told me “just don’t be so anxious”. lol I’m sorry but what?  What a rude bitch!  So I stopped talking about the last ten years, because for the love of God, I just didn’t want to get into it with her and her combative aura. The truth is that I really don’t struggle with anxiety like I used to, thanks to life being better and the right medication. If this was something anxiety was going to cause in me, it would have happened years ago. 

On the drive home, I was in tears. I called the appointment line back and said I wanted to see a cardiologist. And that’s where I went today, to the cardiologist. The cardiologist and I talked about a lot of things in detail. She told me that my holter monitor showed an extra heartbeat, which is what was causing palpitations, and that my habit of 1/2 to two energy drinks a day likely caused it. I agreed to cut energy drinks completely. She also gave me a medication called propanol, which my dad used to take. My medication list is starting to sound like my dad’s medication list with propanol, gabapentin and atorvastatin. I’m becoming my father! These days I’m actually starting to look like him too. My mother has called me “Bill in drag.” Bill was my dad’s name. I said- thanks?  

But anyway. 

She also ordered some more detailed imagining of my heart and set up an appointment for October 25th with another 24 hour holster monitor right before that appointment. 

The last but not least thing she gave me was called the heart healthy diet. It’s a list of food that if you stick too, will I guess make your heart more healthy. 

This afternoon, I developed my own “ideal sandwich based on the heart healthy diet. Here it is- 

Ezekiel 4:9 bread from the frozen section. It’s the 15 sprouted grains bread. There’s another similar loaf that’s cheaper. I got one of the cheaper loaf and the Ezekiel bread. 

Mung bean sprouts or any type of sprouts.

Tofu 

Lettuce, onion, tomato 

Avocado slices

If you want meat, lean turkey breast or leave it out if vegetarian. 

Mustard (sometimes) 

It’s very good, and I decided to live off of these sandwiches all weekend at least. I might make lentils Monday night. I really don’t know what else to do for this diet. I already drink nut milks instead of real milk. I also have a box of whole grain cheerios that I can have with almond milk for breakfast. With this “austerity diet”, propranolol, and a little more exercise (it’s harder in the extreme heat this time of year) I bet I feel better and do better in no time. 

 

Updates on Thrift Finds

 

Evita tried on the dress before I tore it apart. The expression on her face says she never would have worn it anyway, even though it appears to fit her to a T. The first thing I did with this dress was take out the zipper. My thrift finds from Sunday produced three zippers for my sewing kit. I’m not sure how much zippers are in a fabric store, but a few dollars at least. I took off all the trim and also put that in my sewing kit. There was more trim in this than I thought. 

I also got the zipper out of the dress with the built in bra  

 I also cut out the boob enhancers and put those in my sewing kit along with the silver trim, the emblem, and the long row of green shantung from the bottom.  

The denim long dress also got me a zipper: 

I also cut 30 squares for future denim chenille quilts and the six little flowers on the front went into my sewing kit. 

I also got a lot of elastic for the sewing kit from the enormous purple pants made from quilting fabric. 

I haven’t cut them into squares yet, though. That’s on the list. 

Another thing I didn’t mention was that I got an enormous red T-shirt in size 4X. It goes to my knees. This doesn’t need a picture. It’s just a huge red t-shirt. I plan to take it in and shape it to make it a fitted women’s t-shirt. You can alter t-shirts with a zig zag stitch. 

Then I started preparing all the ties we bought for Evita’s necktie skirt. Seven of the ties had horsehair interfacing!  That’s really expensive. The other ties had polyester interfacing which I threw away. But I saved the horsehair in my sewing kit for headbands and things with collars I may make in the future. 

No actual buttons though. I can’t make it to 25 cent day or 50 cent day this week so hopefully next week. We’ll see!  I don't have enough ties for the skirt so need to go back anyway. 

Thrifted Transformation Hopefuls

Today I took my daughter to the thrift store that has 25 cent Wednesdays. Sunday is $1.50 day, and I wanted her to look around for things that go with her unique style. She found a handful of things, I bought a bunch of ties for her tie skirt, and I looked for things to “transform” in order to relearn my sewing abilities that I lost after ten years of debilitating panic attacks. I got the idea from a YouTuber named Coolirpa and her series “Thrifted Transformations.”  

The first thing is this long denim dress in size small. I can take out the buttons, tie, and zipper for my stash and then cut up the skirt into squares for the denim chenille quilts. 

This is also size small. I think I can probably cut it apart, make the gathered pieces into a straight or A line skirt. The bodice, who knows. A quilt square or two?  Ideas can come later as well. 

This one is exactly the same on the back hence no second picture.  I might actually wear this a couple times and then get an idea of what to “transform” it into  

This one I have no idea- it’s beautiful though.  The ideas will come. 

Same with this. It also has a built in bra.  Maybe I can make a bra! 😂  

If nothing else, I can just make headbands out of it for practice.  Like I said, I’m relearning. 

I can wear this.  It fits nicely. But we’ll see, maybe I’ll make it sleeveless and take it in just for practice.  I’m not as advanced as Coolirpa. 

These enormous pants are made from 100% cotton quilting fabric so that is that it’s becoming - quilt squares  and the elastic can go into my sewing kit stash. 

This one can be used to practice lace stitching.  

 

Ideas welcome!!

Thrift Stores are the new Fabric Stores

 A lot of people online who sew are making it more popular to repurpose thrift store items than to build their “stashes” from items bought new at the fabric stores. That’s because fabric stores are getting too expensive. So are some thrift stores, but definitely not the one I go to now with their 50 cent Tuesdays and 25 cent Wednesdays. I won’t be able to go either day this week, but maybe next. I was able to get several buttons and two waistbands from all the jeans I bought last Tuesday on 25 cent day. 

I didn’t take out any buttons that were fastened with a grommet. Just the regular buttons pictured above. I’m going to use the waistbands to make skirts. At least one of which will be a neck tie skirt. 

Bread (Focaccia?)

 It’s technically not focaccia, because I didn’t put “holes” in the dough. But it’s focaccia-like because of the veggies. 

Ended Friendship

I had to end my friendship with T over her not approving of my relationship with Kevin. Of course I didn’t “have to”. This is the kind of stuff I’ve dealt with for years. Random people trying to tell me that I shouldn’t want a relationship with a man, or to get married or to have a family. T never met Kevin. It’s not him she has a problem with, it’s the idea of a relationship in general. I blocked her number after this and blocked her on all social media. But it’s still staying with me. I often struggle with this pressure from society to believe that he’s just going to up and leave me at any moment. How do I satisfy that sort of  “societal requirement” of me and still trust him/believe him when he says he’ll never leave me?  It’s the most intangible balance ever- the balance probably doesn’t even exist. The pressure on women to always be ready, even to the point of having a “Go Bag” is likely not conducive to having a trusting relationship. Maybe that was done on purpose, so we could all be an island. 

Kevin likes to watch YouTube videos of people getting arrested. I’m not sure the appeal, it’s his thing. The other day I was in bed reading while Kevin watched This video. I couldn’t help it, I blurted out that she reminded me of T. Since Kevin never met T, he said “seriously?”  Yes. The rambling, the constant changing subjects, the constant obvious intoxication. Even though this lady passed the sobriety test at the end, she clearly wasn’t sober. 

T’s ramblings are clear in the below screenshots. Ohio is a dowry state?  Is it really?  Was I actually tempted to believe that at first?  

My mother gave my mother in law an unused raised toilet seat. We joked that that’s my dowry. Oh no, “Texas is a dowry state!”  

I miss T, I really do, but you need to cut people off when they’re like this. 

 

Denim Scrap Wreath 👖

The two scrap wreaths I made before were given to my mom and mother in law. I started cutting up the jeans I bought at the thrift store last week for 25 cents each and made a denim scrap wreath. The denim one was more tricky. The strips had to be one inch wide instead of two, and they had to be stretchy (either from fabric that contained spandex or that was cut diagonal to the grainline). They also had to be tied onto two rungs of the wreath frame instead of only one. 

As you can see, Mitchell is a huge fan. 

Some other things I am working on:

I purchased a Wordpress domain for $49 a year and have been blogging about all the work I’ve done over the years with children. It’s to help me write my book, is under a different pseudonym, I'm not ready to share it yet, and I’ve been doing one post a day. 

I’ve also been watching a YouTuber named Coolirpa who is got to be the most gifted seamstress I’ve ever seen. She has a series called Thrifted Transformations where she transforms things she found in thrift stores. I want to do my own thrifted transformations. They won’t be as elaborate as hers, but I am going to do some things with some 25 cent Wednesday finds or 50 cent Tuesday finds. For starters, Evita wants me to make her a Skirt from neckties. I will be using a waistband and zipper taken from the jeans I bought on 25 cent day. 

We went to the store where Evita works as a cashier yesterday and went through her line. Here’s a pic I snapped of her. Yes she’s wearing an inside out shirt. When I asked her why, she said “Because I have to wear plain black shirts”. So today I went and got her three small black polo shirts. 

 

Scrap Wreaths

 I threw these together today from the leftover fabric from Evita’s denim chenille quilts.  I cut the squares into two inch strips, grabbed two wreath frames, and tied tied tied. I got the idea from a YouTuber named Dave from “Dave’s Wreaths and Things.” 

17th Birthday and More on the Quilts

 So… No. At least I don’t think so. I made several of these several years ago, and they have held up through several washings. My mom keeps one on her chair and one in her closet. I have one in my car. They were all made about 15 years ago. I used the smallest and tightest setting on the stitches, and it’s the fibers in the fabrics that’s unraveling. Not the thread. 

My daughter loves them. She even said they feel like together they can feel like a “weighted blanket”. She and I have a weighted blanket, but it’s drab gray. They never come in fun colors or patterns. 

I gave them to her today because it’s her 17th birthday. I woke up this morning with the song “Dancing Queen” stuck in my head for that reason. “She’s a dancing queen! Only 17!”  I also got her this shrimp platter and cake before I picked her up. I took her to Panera and then to work. This store has her working a lot of hours. I’m happy for her. She’s making good money and has no bills!

She also celebrated the other day with friends!

Denim Chenille Quilts are Done! ✅

 

Missing Child

 I’m slowly but surely working on a blog post about missing people that might be alive. When ready, the post will be here. I started that blog almost two years ago, and I have since decided that writing about each individual case is not for me. For one thing, there are so many missing persons, I could never keep up. I would probably leave out the one person that does get found alive. For another thing, there are a lot of good podcasters that are called to do that. Also, a lot of family members do not like that their loved ones’ stories are exploited for entertainment. Many family members want all the media attention they can get, believing that it can lead to answers. It can!  It’s also valid to not want people listening to their stories for shock value. I remember two siblings fighting online over their missing sister. One of the siblings wanted to be interviewed by podcasts, believing it would lead to answers and the other sibling didn’t want the exploitation. 

I would rather talk about it *in general* why a missing person might still be alive.  

One missing person that I am very passionate about is Cherrie Mahan. She was kidnapped at age 8 in 1985, and would today be 47. I adore Cherrie’s mother. She’s a wonderful advocate. She’s very open about her struggles with addiction after her daughter’s disappearance as well. I just like her a lot. So when a woman recently came forward claiming to be Cherrie, I was hopeful. But Cherrie’s mother and others in her facebook group weren’t. Apparently this was the fourth person over the years to claim to be her, and it was messing with her mom’s mental health. The members of the Facebook group pretty much ate her alive. I started to hope that it wouldn’t be Cherrie. I can’t imagine being a victim and receiving those comments. In the end, it wasn’t her.

Sometimes all I can get done on that new blog post is two or three sentences a week. It’s hard, but I want to get it done. The whole thing with Cherrie was a setback, but I still believe that people claiming to be missing people shouldn’t be so easily dismissed. If they are, then why would a real mossing person come forward knowing that they’ll just be hated and called a fake?  

25 Cent Day at Family Thrift

The name of the thrift store in West Houston is Family Thrift on Hwy 6. This is the one that charges a different amount every day with Wednesday being the cheapest at 25 cents and Thursday being the most expensive at $2.25. 

My goal is to make denim chenille quilts for an Etsy shop. Kevin is going to help me tally up how much each one costs to make. He’s an accountant (by degree) but I know it’s just one big algebra equation. Algebra wasn’t my strong suit. 

I assumed the thrift store didn’t open until 9 and got there at 9:30. There were already a ton of people. I went up and down the aisles and took every pair of jeans that was long, one tear or no tears, and had legs wide enough to fit my ruler all the way down. As you can see above, the store was a mess. I noticed that several sections were blocked off with sheets. 

I waited in line for 30 minutes. I started conversing with two elderly men who seemed like they were regulars and knew this thrift store in and out. I asked why so many sections were blocked off. He said because of it being 25 cent day. Those sections were open on more expensive days. But 25 cent day was “just the leftovers” ie, stuff they want to hurry to get rid of. Then he told me that the store was only open from 7:30-11:30 on Wednesdays!  You gotta get there early, apparently. That sucked, because I wanted to put all the jeans in my car and then come back and look for things for the family. It was already almost 11:30 when I checked out. 

In the end, my total was $7.04, and this is what I got for that. 

 

Birthday Donation

My daughter has three pugs at her father’s house. One was obtained from a breeder, and the other two came from a rescue called Pug Hearts. Here are two of her pugs getting into it on the couch. 

Recently she called and said Pug Hearts was in crisis. They have too many pugs and not enough money. She asked if I would adopt one. I said no- I’m scared to own a pug due to their breathing issues, among other things. I personally would rather adopt privately from a person needing to rehome their animal than to have to worry about “approval” from these organizations. But Pug Hearts is important to my daughter, so I made a $50 donation in her honor for her 17th birthday which is a week from today. She was very happy with that, and so was I. 

 

Another Thing to Overcome

 I’ve discovered a lot of people online discussing this recently, and it’s helped me feel not so alone. 

Many people are talking about how when they were children, their parents pointed to major catastrophes in the news and told them that these things were their fault, just so they could have some laughs. A young woman online described how she was in second grade when 9/11 happened. Her mother would point to images of it on tv and tell her that she caused that. She was a junior in high school when she realized that she actually didn’t cause 9/11. When she confronted her mother about it, her mother accused her of not being able to take a joke. 

Others chimed in with their experiences of the same thing. Luckily, I was already an adult when 9/11 happened, but my parents did the same thing with the challenger explosion, the baby that fell into the well, and the Ethiopian famine. Even though you come to understand when you’re older that these things are beyond your control, there are still intrusive thoughts that come with the trauma of that. For me, there tends to be over apologizing and over compensating. 

It never occurred to me that joking with your kids in such a manner was so common. I’m glad our generation is open about things. 

Bead Projects

One of my Facebook groups is called “Reuse, Recycling”, and something else. Reduce maybe?  People will post what they want ideas on what to do with, and people give the most amazing ideas. Some of the things, I’m sometimes thinking to myself “geez just throw it away”, but comments like that aren’t conducive to the atmosphere- then the commenters end up giving great ideas to what I would have just thrown out. 

Someone asked what to do with their extra jewelry pieces. And these were ideas given. I have a lot of broken jewelry that I collected from garage sales. I’m definitely planning on making some of these now. I need three styrofoam cones next time I’m at Wally World!  

 

Our Favorite Side Job 🥤 🧃

This is probably the side job I have that I love the most. At the beginning of each month, I can get paid per location to straighten “good2grow” juice bottles at select stores. It reminds me of when my daughter was little. She used to ask me to buy these for her, and she’d ask for the favorite characters of her friends and stepsiblings so she could give them to them. The most hilarious thing is Kevin’s response to this job. For some reason, he loves it. If he’s doing inventory with his job in a store, and he happens to see the good2grow juice section, he complains (to me) if the heads are a mess. It cracks me up.